


just stay alive, that would be enough

by bleulily (winterfells)



Series: trc drabbles [2]
Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: F/M, Noah is here, and it's Gansey's 18th birthday, btw Gansey is a sag, pynch is implied, sort of post-TRK
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-02
Updated: 2016-05-02
Packaged: 2018-06-05 23:58:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6728521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/winterfells/pseuds/bleulily
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He felt calm, calmer than he had felt in a long time. He never thought turning eighteen would be quite like this, he always imagined it as something stressful, the year in which everything would change. And though perhaps nothing would be quite the same, not after everything that happened, he realised it wasn’t all as terrible as he had imagined.</p>
            </blockquote>





	just stay alive, that would be enough

**Author's Note:**

  * For [BlondeTate](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlondeTate/gifts).



Gansey stared out at the window. The sun was setting, and he was amazed by the beautiful colors that grazed his tanned skin. He couldn’t hear the birds that were soon flocking to the trees, but he wished he did. There was something magical about this time of the day, almost as magical as this year had been.

He felt calm, calmer than he had felt in a long time. He never thought turning eighteen would be quite like this, he always imagined it as something stressful, the year in which everything would change. And though perhaps nothing would be quite the same, not after everything that happened, he realised it wasn’t all as terrible as he had imagined.

Ronan and Noah were trying to prepare some drinks for everyone to enjoy this little celebration. Their music was blasting, and though Gansey wasn’t generally a fan, he told himself not to complain and to enjoy the moment.

Everything had happened so fast and so slowly at the same time. Gansey had forgotten what life was like before Glendower, before the psychics at 300 Fox Way, before Blue Sargent. But now that the first time was over, and that Blue had stayed with him for good, he didn’t want to go back. It was time for new beginnings, and Blue Sargent was part of it.

Adam had agreed to take her to Monmouth that evening, Ronan had made sure everything went according to his plans. Which in its entirety wasn’t much, but Gansey knew how much it meant for Ronan to celebrate Gansey’s eighteenth birthday; especially after losing him, even if it had only been for a little while.

He watched them walk inside from the window, and smiled upon seeing their happy faces. There was something so warming about seeing people happy, especially those ones you love the most.

He watched as Ronan handed them drinks, how they all gathered around together to talk. He liked to watch them from afar, how they interacted with one another, their hands in constant movement, their eyes lit, their smiles not quite leaving their faces. They were all so beautiful in a way Gansey couldn’t explain, so glorious, like sunlight.

Gansey sighed and looked back at the window. The sky was slowly turning dark, no longer beautiful shades of pink and orange. He liked the night sky, Blue had taught him to appreciate and admire it; but he felt as though the twilight resonated more with him, so full of nostalgia but somehow bright as the sky could be.

He felt someone shift behind him, and he was glad to find Blue standing before him, a lopsided smile in her lips. She looked beautiful, as always, but he noticed she had done herself with a ribbon, something he had never seen before. She looked adorable.

“You’re eighteen now,” she said softly, “Welcome to the adult life.”

“You know, it isn’t as bad as they say,” Gansey replied, “I find myself in pretty much a similar state to the one I was the day before yesterday. Not everything is as different as it seems.”

“Maybe,” Blue admitted, “But then again, the semester isn’t over, but soon it will, and then we’ll have only one semester left of high school, then comes college.”

“I like to think college won’t change our lives as much as we think. I wouldn’t know how to live with myself if I lost any of you.”

They both turned to look at Adam. He was laughing, probably at some joke Ronan had thrown at them. Gansey noticed the way in which Ronan’s eyes never left him, how carefully he stared at every single one of Adam’s movements, and he smiled. Gansey was confident Adam would never leave them fully.

“Have you thought about what you want to do?” Blue asked suddenly. There was something in her eyes, perhaps fear or sadness, he couldn’t really tell.

“I will go anywhere you want me to go,” he admitted, “That’s my plan.”

“So you don’t want to college?” she asked.

He shook his head. “I know what I want to do, but I know I won’t need to further my studies in order to accomplish it. I trust my own capacity to do this.”

She rolled her eyes. 

He tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear, their faces getting close. He could smell the sweet scent of roses from her hair, he wanted to get closer and feel her breathing against his skin. He hadn’t forgotten their kiss, how soft her lips were, how teasingly perfect her tongue had been.

“I can promise you it’s not such a terrible thing.”

Blue closed her eyelids, letting herself go by his scent of mint, they way in which his head leaned towards hers. “Just stay alive. That would be enough.”

Gansey smiled. “I won’t go anywhere you don’t want me to, Jane.”

If the others were watching them, he didn’t care. He liked to think they were too entertained by one another to even mind watching Gansey kiss Blue. It was his birthday, and after such a long year, Gansey liked to think he deserved to be kissed without having to care about what the others had to say. He wanted this, and no one would take it away from him.

He wasn’t going to die again, at least not until he was much older, both in mind and body.


End file.
